Already off the day's plan, but only 215 cals so far. I'm FREAKING OUT about going to outpatient tomorrow. FREAKING OUT.
I don't think I'm going to be able to eat anything else tonight or tomorrow morning. I'm just so scared that They will look at me and laugh because I'm too fat to have an ED.
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Dahhhhling! Absolutement non!
ReplyDeleteYou are being way too hard on yourself! I know that you're telling yourself that you're too fat, and that it won't be okay, that you're not good enough. MAKE THAT STOP.
Anorexia is a mindset and a lifestyle. Whether you have an eating disorder or not is not determined by your weight. And if some idiot doctor laughs at you, they clearly don't know what they're doing. Actually, they won't laugh at you, becuase that isn't even possible (I have completely accurate perspective of your body, thank you very much. It's only mine that's a different story). I will personally rip them inside out if they say anything that makes you at all upset in any way :)
Stay in control of yourself mind-wise. The food doesn't matter right now - your calories are so low for today! WAY under 500, so if it helps, be proud of that. I'm giving you permission to eat more if you want or need to, and even if that's not enough, I LOVE YOU! Ok? I'll see you tomorrow for our extravaganza. Hold in there Princess Bam Whammity
:^*